The "Joy" of Classical Music

There are certain forms of art that have no place. I wouldn't even call them art, because they're not artful. They're not even commercially artful, though some (those who make money off such "art") would argue. I'm talking about "art" with a blatant, in your face message. Art like the Left Behind novels and movies. Art like Christian Rock music.

The reason I bring all this up is because I just listened to Dvorák's Symphony for the New World, Gershwin's Rhapsody in Blue and I am currently listening to Beethoven's 9th Symphony, after which the only commercial Classical radio station in the entire United States of America will cease broadcasting to become a Lutheran Church-funded Christian Rock station. This is kind of a sad thing to happen. And by kind of, I mean, very.

Classical music has always been a large part of my life. Music in general has, but I have many memories of listening to this radio station (Classic 99.1 KFUO) from my youth. Many people growing up know classical music from Loony Toons. I knew it from the radio and the symphony and the records and tapes and CDs in my parents' music library. I knew it from concerts my father would play in. I knew it as a listener and then I knew it as a performer. Tchaikovsky, Shostakovich, Mozart, Beethoven, Rimsky-Korsakov, Dvorák, Mussorgsky, Hindemith, Salieri...so much more. And I was always able to discover new music by flipping over to the classical station.

The fact that tomorrow morning I'll have one less viable radio station to listen to makes me sad. I refuse to listen to Christian Rock, because there is no artistry. The intent is so heavy-handed, there's no room for interpretation. Each and every song is a love song to Jesus, God, Faith...what pain there is seems to be referenced in passing, removed by Jesus. Where's the humanity in that art? For what is the purpose of art if not to hold a mirror up to reality? And I know, in reality, many people find joy in Faith. Fine. Many people find joy in a well written piece of music. And many musicians and composers believe their talent to be a gift from God. And with that, I have no qualms. My sadness comes from the idea that the owners of the new Joy FM feel the need to remind us of God. To quote Douglas Adams, "Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?" Except, in this case, do we have to hang sings on the plants that there are fairies at work? It cheapens the beauty of the flowers.

As I understand it, most Christian Rock bands are put together the same way that other tasteless mass market pop is put together; some people who want to make money put together a marketable package of pseudo musicians with only enough talent to do exactly as they are told. Somebody else writes their music for them, and all they do is record it and perform it. So the artistry is not even there at the beginning. Just get a good looking group of people with decent singing voices and the ability to cover the instrumentation you need, and (in the case of Christian Rock) make sure they're clean cut and regular churchgoers.

Never mind the fact that a few short decades ago, the predecessors of the people now putting together these rock groups decried rock and roll as "the devil's music." I really want to know what late 70's tech geek and person of faith engineered his record player to play Hotel California backwards to hear "Worship Satan" over and over. Let's just skip that part and get to Joy FM.

Why did this happen in St. Louis? This is tantamount to the symphony hall closing and becoming a church. Or the art museum becoming a tabernacle. I am sad, I am indignant, and I am sad. In that order.

Sorry this wasn't more coherent. I just don't know what else to say without inflaming any anti-religion v religion debates. For the record, I am an atheist who loves classical music, so of course I oppose this. But many people of faith oppose this as well, mostly because we already have radio and television outlets in St. Louis for religious expression. Now we have no easily accessible outlet for classical music. Sure, there's internet radio and satellite radio and HD radio and CD and mp3, but not everybody can gain access to these things. It's just sad.

I Haven't Forgotten...

...about the top albums of the decade. I am writing that post in spurts and will post when I am finished.

However, first I wanted to vent about something that just happened to me.

You may recall my undeniable love for Sunny Day Real Estate and especially for Diary, their first album. You may also remember that I mentioned how the band had released remastered versions of Diary and LP2 this year to coincide with their reunion tour. You might remember, too, that I said they were available on vinyl. And finally, you probably forgot that I told you that I received LP2 Remastered on vinyl for my birthday. What you definitely don't know (because I haven't told you yet) is that for Christmas, my friend Beth gave me Diary Remastered on vinyl the Saturday before Christmas. The very next day, I put it on my turntable and lowered the stylus onto the record. I waited for the needle to find the groove. I watched as a really nasty warp kicked the stylus up and off of the record. I swore.

I called Beth up just to ask where she bought it, and she told me Amazon.com. So I called Amazon, and set up a gift return (I was trying to set up an exchange, but apparently the guy I was talking to did not understand that concept). So, I printed out the shipping label, sent it off on the Tuesday before Christmas. On Christmas Eve, I got an e-mail saying they had received the package and that I had been refunded with a gift card, so on Christmas Eve I ordered the album again.

So today, four days after Christmas and a good ten days after I received the album as a present, I checked the tracking status of my order and saw that it had arrived at my door. I had to stay late at work, which of course made the anticipation nearly kill me, but I waited it out and returned home two and a half hours late. I ate dinner, took a shower, threw in a load of laundry, talked to Kathy, then unboxed the record, removed the shrink wrap, put the first record on the turntable and lowered the stylus onto the record. I waited for the needle to find the groove. I watched as a really nasty warp kicked the stylus up and off of the record. This time, I really swore.

It was then I noticed the condition of the album cover; the upper left corner is all mashed up. This thing looks like it had been shipped from Seattle to Kentucky to St. Louis to Kentucky to St. Louis. In short, I am fairly certain Amazon.com shipped me the record I just returned to them as broken. Which means I will have to wait another four business days at least before I can listen to my record. Considering Friday is New Year's Day, that translates to at the very earliest I will be able to listen to this record next Tuesday, nearly two and a half weeks after I got it as a present.

I asked when I authorized a return this time if I could get the refund on my credit card rather than as a gift card. No can do. I asked, "What if the same thing happens again?" Then the same thing will happen again, and I can get the refund on my credit card if when I check out the next time I buy it with my credit card. That means I will have an Amazon gift card to spend, sure, but this is the only thing I am wanting to buy right now. Sure, down the road, I will buy something else on Amazon, but it's not like I was planning on buying a movie at Best Buy and might as well buy it online and get the record at Euclid Records or Vintage Vinyl here in town. I don't plan on spending they money, you know?

I guess the moral of this story is, if you're going to buy vinyl records, don't buy them on Amazon.com, buy them at a local record shop. If you're unlucky and don't have one of those anymore, you'd probably have better luck opening a local record shop yourself rather than ordering vinyl from Amazon. If you don't have the means to do this, you'd probably have better luck driving several hours to some other locality's local record shop. Bottom line, this experience has taught me to never order vinyl from Amazon again. I will gladly order DVDs, books, and other crap. But never will I ever order vinyl from Amazon.com. EVER. /End Rant.